Rejection Sensitivity represents a distinct and profound aspect of human emotional experience, in neurodivergent individuals and particularly salient in those with ADHD or AuDHD. While often conflated with other experiences like social anxiety or self-rejection patterns, rejection sensitivity stands as its own unique phenomenon, characterised by intense, immediate emotional and physiological responses to actual or perceived rejection. For those experiencing rejection sensitivity directly, I hope this exploration helps validate your experiences and maybe it could also have provided examples of experiences that you now reconise as RSD.

Many autistic adults come to therapy carrying the weight of being told they're "unmotivated" when actually their motivations simply differ from neurotypical expectations. This difference isn't a deficit – it's a valid expression of neurodivergent being.

If you are an autistic person, consider how often you've been told you're "not interested" in something when you're deeply engaged in your own way, or been accused of "not caring" when you care intensely but express it differently. These experiences reflect a broader societal pattern of imposing neuronormative motivational frameworks onto autistic ways of being.

As a psychotherapist who discovered later in life that I am autistic I’ve witnessed how the democratisation of information-sharing through the internet has led to a surge in first-hand accounts, personal blogs, and social media discussions led by autistic people themselves. This expanded understanding has profound implications for how autism is understood by medical professionals, therapists, and by the general public. The shift has moved us from a paradigm where autism was primarily written about in clinical materials and defined by observable behaviors, to one that is bursting with rich descriptions of internal experiences and authentic life issues, both large and small…

From my personal experience, I can attest to the fluctuating nature of what might be termed "functioning." There are days when I can seamlessly navigate complex social situations and professional demands, while on others, basic tasks can feel overwhelmingly challenging. This variability is not a reflection of changing abilities, but rather of the complex interplay between internal states, environmental factors, and societal demands.

The Influence of Societal Expectations 

I can’t really discuss functioning without acknowledging...

This journey of self-discovery has given me unique insights into the complexities of neurodivergence, especially the interplay between autism and ADHD. I often think of it as a Yin and Yang relationship between parts of myself. Some traits of ADHD can be opposite to those of autism, which can make self-identification (or diagnosis) challenging. ‘Willpower’ as it might be called, is rarely effective for ADHD-ers. Instead, there are lots of other possibilities of strategies and symptoms that could be found to be much more useful for ADHD-ers setting goals, achieving accomplishments and getting what you want out of yourself.

As an autistic psychotherapist who has experienced situational mutism firsthand, I understand the profound physical and emotional impact it can have. Situational mutism isn't a choice or a behavioral issue - it's an involuntary, embodied response often triggered by sensory overload or perceived threats. For many of us, it feels like a literal blockage, a physical inability to produce speech despite our desires to communicate. By approaching situational mutism through a neurodiversity-affirming lens, we can move beyond pathologizing views and instead honor it as a valid form of autistic expression and self-protection. This shift in perspective opens up new possibilities for healing and growth, allowing autistic individuals to embrace their authentic selves and navigate their unique communication journeys with greater understanding and self-compassion.

For many autistic people, anxiety is not just an occasional visitor but a constant companion. Unlike allistic individuals who may experience anxiety in response to specific triggers, autistic people often report feeling anxious "all the time" or "as far back as they can remember." This pervasive anxiety can be so ingrained in their daily experience that it becomes difficult to identify or articulate as a distinct emotion. As one autistic individual described it, "It's like asking a fish what they think about water."

This blog article explores the multifaceted nature of anxiety in autistic people, its origins, manifestations, and potential strategies for management and support.

This article explores autistic masking, especially those discovering their neurodiversity later in life. As an autistic psychotherapist, I describe it as a crucial survival mechanism that protects but often harms our well-being.

This article discusses the impacts of long-term masking, autistic burnout, and the path to self-acceptance. As a psychotherapist and autistic person myself, I offer insights on embracing autistic identity and balancing adaptation with authenticity in a neurotypical world. Unmasking with insights and self-responsibility, and guiding oneself from survival to thriving as our true selves.

Vauna Beauvais’s Neuroaffirming Therapy for Autistic and ADHD Clients

Vauna offers neuroaffirming therapy for autistic and ADHD clients, and illustrates in this blog post the relevance to mental health of embracing one's neurodivergent identity.

As an autistic psychotherapist with ADHD herself, Vauna understands firsthand the challenges but also strengths of being neurodivergent. Her own experiences fuel her passion for helping clients develop a positive self-concept.

In her neuroaffirming approach, underpinning whatever else the client has come to therapy about, Vauna focuses on validating clients’ neurodivergent identity. Sessions explore the gifts and talents unique to being neurodivergent, in addition to exploring any conflicts or risks about this.

Vauna Beauvais, psychotherapist, expresses joy about being awarded the Post Graduate certificate in Autism, awarded by Sheffield Hallam University, and designed and delivered by Dr Luke Beardon, a respected prominent thought-leader in autism and improving the lives of autistic people.

Reasons for revealing that I am an autistic psychotherapist with ADHD. How does telling clients about my neurotype help them to know whether I am the right therapist for them? There are many benefits of having a neurodivergent psychotherapist, counsellor or coach.